Men's VS Women's Prime

Who decides the prime?

SELF DEVELOPMENTPARENTING

5/13/20234 min read

Last week, while indulging in some YouTube content, I stumbled upon a heated debate (from @whatever) about older men dating younger women.

The discussion revolved around men in their 40s refusing to date women in their 30s or 40s.

The men feel that it is only fair for those who are in their prime (in their 40s, successful and have money) to date women who are also in their prime (early 20s).

This got me thinking: Who exactly determines when men and women are at their best?

Apparently, it is just all societal standards.

The Stone Age Dilemma

Back in the Stone Age, when hunting was a necessity, it made sense to perceive men's prime as being between 19 and 25.

After all, those were the years when men were physically at their fittest, chasing mammoths and discovering the wonders of fire.

It was survival of the fittest, both literally and romantically.

As our society has evolved and developed an abundance of tools and technologies, the need for hunting has significantly decreased.

Consequently, the general consensus on men's prime age range has expanded.

Today, we recognize that a man's prime can encompass not only physical prowess but also emotional maturity and career accomplishments. So, does this mean a man's prime can span from the age of 21 to 45?

It's a thought to ponder!

close-up photography of woman and man
close-up photography of woman and man

The Woman's Prime Paradox

While men's prime seems to have expanded like the waistline after a Thanksgiving feast, the perception of women's prime has remained relatively stagnant.

The stereotype continues to prevail, suggesting that a woman's best years are in her early 20s when her biological health is supposedly at its peak for procreation and survival.

Yes, it's true that a woman's early 20s may be the prime time for fertility. However, this doesn't mean that a woman's worth or attractiveness diminishes as she ages.

Like men, women continue to flourish emotionally, intellectually, and personally throughout their lives. So, why should we limit the notion of prime to just a biological clock?

a 3d image of a woman floating in the air
a 3d image of a woman floating in the air

Breaking Free from Stereotypes

woman standing beside gray brickwall
woman standing beside gray brickwall

In some cultures, such as China, unmarried women over the age of 30 are labeled as 剩女which means "leftover women".

This derogatory term is not only absurd but also degrading.

It places undue pressure on women to conform to societal expectations and hastily enter into relationships for fear of being judged.

As a proud father of two daughters, my utmost wish for them is to find happiness and fulfillment in their lives.

I would rather see them remain happily single than rush into marriage for the wrong reasons. I've witnessed firsthand the unfortunate consequences when women feel pressured to marry solely because they fear they are growing older.

Regrettably, many of my dear lady friends who hastily entered such marriages did not find the happiness they had hoped for.

Marriage should be a union built on love, respect, and genuine compatibility.

It should not be driven by societal expectations or the fear of being labeled as "too old." It breaks my heart to see individuals make such significant life decisions based on arbitrary timelines or external judgments.

Life is too precious to settle for anything less than true happiness.

Instead, I want my daughters to prioritize their own well-being, personal growth, and fulfillment.

I encourage them to seek meaningful connections and build strong relationships, both romantically and otherwise.

I believe that when they find the right person, it will be because of a genuine connection and shared values, rather than a rush to beat some invisible societal deadline.

If they don’t, papa is here. ^_^

The Charisma of Confidence

I must confess, my wife is the epitome of prime today.

The charisma she exudes, her self-assuredness, and the wisdom she has accumulated over the years make her incredibly attractive.

This is a testament to the fact that a woman's prime transcends age and is closely tied to her confidence and the meaningful relationships she cultivates—whether they be romantic, platonic, or professional.

Love ya, wifey.

For My Beautiful Girls

I want my daughters to understand that their self-worth is not determined by their marital status or their age.

They are remarkable individuals with unique qualities, talents, and aspirations. It is through self-confidence and self-discovery that they will attract partners who appreciate and cherish them for who they truly are.

Ultimately, my message to my daughters and to all young women is this: Do not let societal pressure dictate your decisions or define your worth.

Embrace your journey of self-discovery, focus on personal growth, and surround yourself with supportive relationships.

Remember, true happiness and fulfillment come from being authentic and true to yourself, rather than conforming to societal expectations.

Let's celebrate our confidence, accomplishments, and the wonderful connections we have in our lives.

If someone fails to appreciate your worth because they're fixated on a rigid concept of prime, let's bid them adieu with a kind smile, empathizing with their idiocy and knowing they missed out on something extraordinary.

So, my dear girls and lady friends, take your time, enjoy life's adventures, and trust that the right person will come along when the time is right.

With love.